Tom Whitney remembers late brother in PGA TOUR debut

It was a simple question, but the answer was wrought with meaning.

Tom Whitney had just graduated from the Korn Ferry Tour on a crisp October afternoon in southern Indiana. He was #TOURBound, and it was time to meet the media and the Q and A began with a question that Whitney could only answer from the heart.

“What does this mean to you? What are you thinking about right now?”

Whitney paused. The moment was perfect, aside from the absence of one person. He reached into his pocket for the U.S. Air Force dog tag that he uses as a ball marker. And as a reminder. It’s the tag of his older brother Bob, his mentor, golf rival and best friend. Four years ago, Bob died by suicide at age 33 after dealing with depression. This dream — a PGA TOUR card — was Bob’s too.

“Long nine-year journey to get here,” Whitney said, turning the tag over in his fingers. “A lot of ups and downs in the middle of that. I knew (the emotion) was going to happen, but with my brother not being able to share this with me … these are still tears of joy, but I’m missing the fact that he can’t be here.”

He held up the dog tag.

“The good news is he’ll still be marking my ball in January,” he continued. “I’ve got his dog tag with me, still use it every round, every hole.”

Whitney will make his first start as a PGA TOUR member this week at The American Express in his old hometown of La Quinta, California. The location allows him to look hopefully to the future while reflecting on all that preceded this milestone.

This was the brothers’ shared dream. The American Express is just six miles from La Quinta High School, where they starred on the golf team. They pushed each other to be better, and sometimes Bob got the upper hand (he was second in his high school class; Tom was 10th).

Tom is proud of his older brother, as Bob was of him. As Tom progressed through mini-tours, PGA TOUR Latinoamérica and the Korn Ferry Tour, Bob followed along, eagerly updating friends and colleagues on Tom’s progress.

“His co-workers that don’t even follow golf,” Tom said, “probably know more about the sport, just because of how much he was a fan of mine.”

Bob was the rule follower; Tom was the rule pusher. After fulfilling his term on active duty, Bob remained in the Air Force as an intelligence officer, progressing to the rank of major. True to his nature, Tom pushed the limits as he dove into the uncertain world of mini-tour golf. Making it to the PGA TOUR was no guarantee, the brothers both knew, but Bob loved the idea.

“When I told him I wanted to go pro,” Tom said, “he knew it was the right decision.”

Tom’s first PGA TOUR card is a receipt of Bob’s belief.

Bob and Tom started playing golf at ages 9 and 6, respectively, in South Lake Tahoe, California. It was their second sport after tennis. After they moved to La Quinta as middle schoolers – Bob in eighth grade, Tom in sixth – golf and tennis were played in the same season, so they had to pick one. Bob chose golf, for its variety and solitude. Tom followed. The brothers progressed as star golfers at La Quinta High, with Bob going on to attend the United States Air Force Academy. Tom would often visit and play golf with the team, and it seemed inevitable that he would follow Bob’s footsteps as a Falcon. Two years later, he did.

The seeds for the Whitney family’s golf bug were planted by happenstance. Mike Whitney laughs when telling the story of a friend from Lake Tahoe who would do drywall work on the family’s house. Some days the friend wouldn’t show up – this was before cell phones – and Mike got wind that the friend might be hitting balls at the nearby Tahoe Paradise Golf Course. Mike would head to the course to investigate, find his friend and join in hitting some balls.

Shortly thereafter, Bob and Tom received golf clubs for Christmas – kids’ sets from Kmart, maybe five or six clubs. They’d putt around the house, hang at the driving range and progress to summer camps and area junior tours. Mike soaked in as much instruction as possible from golf magazines and would pass it along to his sons – early on, Bob was more technically oriented and would meticulously apply the instruction on the course, whereas Tom would respectfully listen before reverting to his familiar feels on the course.

Bob, who played to a scratch handicap, had a long, fluid swing that was always the envy of his little brother.

“A lot prettier than mine,” Tom said. “One of the prettiest, most fluid swings … His tempo was absolutely perfect. He had a nice, reverse-C finish, which is funny when you juxtapose it with my swing, because I’m short, compact; I’ve got a lot of speed through impact.”

After a successful collegiate career playing for the Air Force Falcons, Tom fulfilled four years of active duty, largely spent as a nuclear missile operator. He’d work 24-hour shifts with a partner underground in a hardened facility, taking orders directly from United States Strategic Command – which took orders directly from the president.

Tom enjoyed his time; he could very easily still be in the Air Force today.

“I could be well over halfway to retirement in the Air Force and still be pulling a pretty good paycheck with guaranteed promotions,” he said.

But his self-belief – and Bob’s belief – pushed him onward.

Whitney separated from the military on May 1, 2014, and made his full-time professional debut at the eGolf Tour’s Avondale Open in Palm Desert, California, the following week. He shot 69-65-64 and won by four. He Monday qualified for his first Korn Ferry Tour event in 2015, then bounced between the Korn Ferry Tour and PGA TOUR Latinoamérica for a few years before finishing No. 2 on the Latin American circuit in 2019 to earn strong Korn Ferry Tour status.

Not that there weren’t setbacks.

In the 2021 Korn Ferry Tour Finals, Whitney missed a 3-foot putt on the last hole of Round 2 at the Nationwide Children’s Hospital Championship to miss the cut by one. If he had made that putt, he would have likely earned his first TOUR card. It stung, but he chose to find the silver lining, posting on Instagram that, “It's a great learning opportunity moving forward, learning how to block out doubt and fear when the pressure is on. I'm grateful for these moments.”

Two years later, he earned his moment. Whitney recorded two top-three finishes in his first five Korn Ferry Tour starts of 2023 and held a spot in the top 30 on the season-long standings (the threshold for a PGA TOUR card) from the second event onward.

“It was a very difficult decision to separate early and chase this dream,” Whitney said. “The fact that I have this validation of keeping faith in my life and where I feel like God’s leading me, and the journey’s still going on the golf course, I’m pretty excited about that.”

On that final day of the Korn Ferry Tour season finale, with family and friends having come from far and wide to share in the triumph, it was hard not to feel overwhelmed by the journey, the doubts, the heartache. His decision to leave the Air Force was not easy, and came with no guarantees, but after all the ups and downs, it had worked out.

Bob would have loved it, and his presence will be felt – the buttery swing, the boundless enthusiasm, that dog tag – as his little brother takes his first steps on the PGA TOUR.

“I try to live with the joy that he lived with,” Tom said. “Just always laugh and smile.”