PONTE VEDRA BEACH, Fla. – J.J. Spaun stopped mid-sentence. A TV on the back wall of the TPC Sawgrass media center had caught his attention.

“Can I just watch it?” Spaun asked. “I haven't seen it.”

For the last 10 minutes, Spaun had answered questions about this shot, his shot, on the famed island par-3 17th. Were you in between clubs? "No. It was always a chippy 8-iron." When did you realize it was going in the water? "Never. If anything, it looked short." How quickly did you move past it?

Well, he tried. But now seeing the replay, Spaun was transfixed.

“Look how high it is. It's floating,” Spaun exclaimed, watching the ball apex and drop into the water behind the green. “I almost wanted to say, ‘Get up,’ because it just looked like it was going to be short.”

Another reporter readied to ask another question and take his attention away, but Spaun couldn’t stop watching.

“Anyways, I was stunned,” he said, cutting off the start of a different question with his eyes still still trained on the replay. “I couldn't believe it was long.”

It was a moment worth lingering on. That shot, the little chippy 8-iron that flew too well and too true into a howling wind cost Spaun a chance at THE PLAYERS Championship. Many exemplary shots over the previous four days got Spaun to that moment – a dramatic head-to-head playoff on Monday morning with Rory McIlroy, the best player of this generation.

But that will be the shot he remembers – that we all remember. The shot you just can't hit, but that so many do because of the wind, the atmosphere or the pressure of contention. Before the shot, Spaun trailed McIlroy by one but was still very much in the tournament. After it, the tournament was all but over.

Spaun made a triple bogey and McIlroy steered it in with two closing bogeys to win his second PLAYERS Championship and 28th PGA TOUR event.

“I feel bad for J.J., he hit a really good shot on 17 and it just went straight through the wind,” McIlroy said, standing on the 18th green.

Spaun had some of those feelings, too. Yet he walked off the 18th green and greeted family with a smile. He hugged TOUR pros Kurt Kitayama and Rico Hoey, who stayed the night to watch their friend potentially earn his crowning career achievement, and he spoke with his head held high.

The version of Spaun from two years ago wouldn’t have stayed in contention, much less been a revolution or two short of winning the tournament with a birdie on the 18th green Sunday night. There was a lot to be proud of.

“Nothing but positives to take from it,” Spaun said.

It’s the type of mental clarity and perspective that only comes when you’ve been where Spaun has been. Before he won his first PGA TOUR title at the 2022 Valero Texas Open, Spaun was openly considering quitting pro golf. He called his San Diego State head coach, Ryan Donovan, and asked him if he knew of any good golf clubs that needed a golf pro.

“I’m like, ‘Dude you still have a TOUR card,’” Donovan told PGATOUR.COM. “That’s how hard he is on himself.”

Even after he won, Spaun dreaded contention. He shot an 8-over 78 in the final pairing on Sunday at the 2022 FedEx St. Jude Championship leaving much more scar tissue than he cared to admit.

“I didn't want to have that feeling of – not defeat, but just like crawl-into-a-hole-and-die kind of a feeling because it was just so embarrassing,” Spaun said. “I was just afraid to feel embarrassed again.”

Spaun was in contention at the Sony Open in Hawaii earlier this year, playing in the final group and again not winning. It felt different, though. He didn’t hit it well and missed the playoff by a shot, but that overwhelming embarrassment didn’t return.

Spaun told himself he no longer needed to fear the moment. The best athletes in the world embrace them. He could, too.

It also helps that Spaun’s game is in a much better, more sustainable place. His ball-striking has improved dramatically. He ranked 84th in Strokes Gained: Approach in 2022. He was 17th last year and is third overall to begin 2025. With the runner-up finish, he moved to No. 25 in the Official World Golf Ranking, a career high. He will play the Masters this year.

Mentally he’s also learned it’s not do or die. Kids have helped that. Spaun has a 4-year-old and another about to turn 2. In the early years of being a dad, Spaun still felt pressure to play well and provide for them. But it flipped last year when he saw his TOUR card was in jeopardy. He was content knowing that if he lost his card, he’d be OK with it. That freed him up for this career resurrection.

“That's kind of when it happened, when I started playing better. I didn't really care so much,” he said.

That doesn’t mean the loss won’t sting. Spaun will watch that shot into 17th plenty more times. He will get asked about it by media and those close to him and he will return to play it again next year. The memories will return, too.

He’s comfortable with that.

“It just wasn't my time,” Spaun said.

Kevin Prise contributed to this report.